The Daily Binge

Top 6 Performance episode, Season 5. Air date 7/29/09.

We open on Cat Deeley, the hostess with the most-ess. She’s wearing a simple purple/blue shift dress and her hair is down and straight. Tonight is not about looking at Cat! As if we need to be reminded, she tells us that one of the top six “will be crowned America’s favorite dancer” next week… “But they need our votes!”

Kayla looks really sexy in the opening name-call dance (love her dress!), and Evan is hipper than usual in a vest and a shirt with a blurry-looking pattern on it. But let’s be real, they all look great. I love Brandon and Ade’s understated style. It’s very thrift store chic.

On top of the always-present Mary Murphy and Nigel Lythgoe, tonight’s third judge is Lil C. He is famous for using big words to make very simple statements in very odd ways. Hoo boy, here we go. “Would you like to pontificate on the preferences of the population?” Cat asks Lil C, and how much do I love Cat? Now and for always.

Cat asks Mary whether she thinks the viewers have made the right choices. Mary answers that it was a shock when Janette left last week (and how!). She counsels Her Fellow Americans to take all performances into consideration, from the auditions through tonight, and vote from the heart.

Nigel’s advice to the competitors is that they bring their personalities out. Nobody is popping like Twitch, Joshua, Gev, or Benji did (that’s kind of funny, since the first three of that list WERE hip-hoppin’ poppers).

Nigel feels as if he hasn’t seen any stand-outs, in terms of the charisma factor. At the moment he thinks that people are voting on the choreography. The dancers have got to become stars or the public will vote for the routines over the people dancing in them. (Which… aren’t they supposed to be voting based on performance? I get what Nigel is saying, but it’s still confusing.)

First up, the guys (Ade, Brandon, Evan) do a routine with Sonya Tayeh. It’s a “Willy Wonka-esque” piece. Evan interviews that it’s, “Weird, dark, abstract, so… I’m feeling it. It’s fun.” I laugh when I hear that, because last week Mia said that Evan was perhaps not dark and twisted enough for Sonya. Evan also talks about surprising power in the throws and lifts. Ade interviews that it takes “all your energy to stop and hit the pictures” that Sonya wants to create. Sonya says that if the boys embrace their power, the piece will be unstoppable.

They dance to the song “True Romance” by She Wants Revenge. I love it—the moves are quirky and fun, and of course there’s a dark Sonya edge. I never knew that Evan had gymnastic skills before tonight—I’m not particularly surprised, but it’s cool to see him pull out another skill. The guys are like fabulous, glitchy Oompa Loompa robots. And they’re wearing purple and lightning bolts—awesome.

After it’s over, we find out that Brandon’s mom is here for the first time. Good thing he made it this far, or she would have missed out.

Lil C says that it’s been a “low key fantasy” of his to get Ade and Brandon in same routine (sexual, no?). He is “living vicariously through Sonya.” To Evan, he says, “Allow me to commend you for not getting swallowed by the dominant excellence of Ade and Evan.” Lil C is the King of left-handed compliments. “You stayed visible through the whole routine,” he says, and I know that he’s trying to say, “Good job.”

Mary is impressed because three totally different dancers did all of the tough moves in sync—high kicks, standing backflips… a lot of amazing stuff. Nigel says that Evan stood out because we’ve never seen him attempt stuff like this (I really wish Evan had gotten more contemporary, less ballroom… but I guess they all got stuck with a lot of rhumbas and waltzes). It’s a standard they couldn’t have achieved in past years.

Jeanine draws Ade’s name from the partner hat. She’s relieved because she wanted him. Ade’s “so much fun behind the scenes” (sexual), and Jeanine thinks he is the strongest partner. Ade loves Jeanine’s energy.

Their dance is a samba with Louis Van Amstel. Jeanine and Ade both interview that they know nothing about samba. Louis tells them that it’s not traditional samba. Jeanine says, “It’s suggestive, but still classy.” After a few clips of Jeanine falling, she admits, “It’s gonna be very sexy, but right now it’s kind of a catastrophe.”

The song is “Love Game” by Lady Gaga, and I’m glad they got a sexy song for a sexy style. Jeanine and Ade are rocking the purple… it’s a very purple night, and I’m totally on board for that. Jeanine is wearing barely anything at all, and a lot of tail-feathers. She looks amazing. The song makes me laugh because the words “ass” and “stick” have been blocked out. (I JUST figured out that “Disco Stick” minus some of those inner letters, is “Dick.” Was that the intention? Either way, HA!) The dance is fun and sexy, especially the lift where Jeanine has her legs wrapped around Ade’s waist. This and the boys’ dance got my Rewind-and-Watch-it-Twice Seal of Enjoyment.

Judgment time. Mary says that the first fifteen seconds were dynamic. When it got into the dancing it started to fall apart for her. Ade wasn’t rolling well enough, and it looked novice to her (to be fair, they knew NOTHING about samba before this week). To make it to the next round, Mary says they need to be hot with their look and their dance.

Lil C starts off my saying that Jeanine looks amazing. (Tell us something we don’t already know.) He was excited about this partnership, and says that they were, “Smashing universes into one another and hoping to get an explosion of excellence.” The dance fell short for him. He says that Ade was “frolicking.”

Nigel lectures Ade that he has to change your style and “get down” for this type of dance. He thinks that Jeanine was beautiful, and that she did a wonderful job. He says, “It’s probably easier for you than for a guy because of how you look, but you seemed terrific.” Ouch! That sounds awfully sexist.

Kayla dances her solo to The Fray’s “You Found Me.” I hate to admit that I like that song. (These recaps are tearing my street cred apart.) I didn’t feel like the solo had enough time to get the emotion totally ramped up before the clock ran out. I think that Kayla is a beautiful dancer, but she doesn’t always squeeze the best stuff into her solos in the time allotted.

Melissa and Evan draw a Tyce D’Orio Broadway routine. Melissa is excited because she thinks Evan has a great personality. Evan thinks Melissa has been a great partner to the other boys in all the dances so far.

Melissa interviews that she’s about the same height as Kayla, who wore flats with Evan. She worried because she’s going to wear heels, and it might be challenging. Two thoughts on that. First, do you really have to wear heels? Second, can we stop talking about Evan’s height already? Poor guy! If he didn’t already have a complex, he’s going to have one now.

The story of this dance is “get me to the church on time.” Evan oversleeps on his wedding day. Evan interviews that once again he’s dancing with a married woman, and now he’s marrying one. “Sorry, husbands of America.” Ha!

Evan is glad to get his own style with Broadway. Melissa interviews that Evan’s faces make her laugh. “Hopefully she’s not laughing at me, because that would hurt my feelings,” Evan says. Melissa reassures us that it’s a mutual laughter, but I don’t entirely believe her. I think that secretly she’s a little worried about partnering with Evan? But I can’t be sure.

Tyce calls Evan “the dream for this style.” “They need to have tons of fun with it.”

At the end of the video lead-in, Evan says, “I’m gonna go marry another married woman. I’ll see you guys later.” He is really a magnet for these married women.

Their costumes are sort of bedroom/lingerie, and it feels more like the morning after the wedding than the morning of. The song is also a jazzier version than the My Fair Lady standard that I had I my head. Overall, it’s really good. When it’s over, Cat says, “May I be the first to congratulate you,” as if they were just hitched. Oh, Cat.

Lil C says that he wanted to see Evan “shine and dominate,” and that he feels like Evan “didn’t take the helm.” (For this Lil C gets lots of boos.) “I expected so much because I know how amazing you are,” Lil C continues. “You danced and performed really good, but you could have aimed for excellence. It was an A, but let’s go for A+.”

“Okay…” Cat says. That pretty much sums up what everyone feels when Lil C critiques. For the record, an A is considered excellent, whether it has a plus behind it or or not. C, on the other hand, is average. (OH SNAP! Did I just burn Lil C? Maybe a Lil.)

Mary says that this dance could be getting Melissa and Evan to the finale on time. (Oh Mary, we love you, but put down your corndog. The wordplay is out of control.) Mary says that it’s hard to take Evan seriously in his underwear. She’s never seen “sock suspenders” in her life, and never wants to see them again. (Why are people always so freaked out by Evan’s potentially sexy moments? All of the other guys have dance practically naked, without any ribbing.) Melissa hasn’t taken a wrong step, in Mary’s eyes. She’s “still cooking.”

Nigel tells Melissa that she has inspired many ballerinas, because they’re seeing more ballerinas than usual at their season six auditions. However, none of the girls they’ve been seeing are able to adapt to other styles like Melissa can. Nigel doesn’t think that this piece was especially demanding for Evan in a technical sense—but it required a lot of personality, and Evan brought it.

Ade dances his solo. I really like his dancing—obviously he’s amazing— but his solos always feel similar to me. “Windowdipper” is still my favorite.

Kayla is partnered with Brandon. He’s excited because he wants to get on the Hot Tamale Train with her. Stacey Tookey choreographs their dance, which is about a mistress who doesn’t have the strength to leave a married man. Kayla interviews that dancers are actors telling a story.

The song is “All I Want” by the Ahn Trio. I feel like we’ve heard a lot of Ahn Trio songs this season. The dance has a lot of lovely sadness to it, and their movement is so beautiful. Kayla and Brandon make a great couple.

Lil C says that for first time Kayla has been equally matched. Mary reassures Brandon that he’s first class on the Hot Tamale Train. Kayla has never taken a wrong step for Mary. She’s perfection on the dance floor.

Nigel points out that the girls have had it tough this season with their dance stories. Randi was butt-stalked and pregnant. Kayla has been an addict, a strangled zombie, and an abused mistress. “The girls are going to need therapy!” he jokes. He wishes that Brandon and Kayla been together sooner for chemistry, but says that they couldn’t have done better together tonight.

Melissa dances a solo to “I Put a Spell on You” by Nina Simone. Someone holds a sign that reads, “Cat says, ‘It’s Melisser!’”

Before each dance in the second round, the dancers talk about what it would mean to them to be in the finale. Obviously, it means a lot to all of them, but this is just one of those things they always do. Vote for me!

Jeanine says that being in the finale would be “the most unanticipated success.” She tried out on a whim, and this is more than she knew she was capable of. Self esteem win!

Jeanine and Ade have a hip hop routine with Tabitha and Napoleon—3rd time for Jeanine, 2nd time for Ade—about friends kicked out of their apartment. Frustration and eviction. The life of an artist!

We see them practicing a “human double Dutch,” and Ade interviews that Jeanine is dangerously close to his “family jewels.” (Is he not allowed to say “balls?” They just bleeped “ass.”) Jeanine is worried that she’ll fall on her face in front of “ten to twenty million people… No big deal!”

Is Jeanine wearing special junk-in-the-trunk pants? The routine is well danced (and Jeanine looks SEXY), but it feels a little gimmicky with all the boxes.

Cat asks Lil C if the dance was “buck.”

Lil C says, “I wish moving were always that fun. I’d relocate every day.” They danced it “way better than I thought you were (would?).” King of the Left-Handed Compliments. Seriously.

Getting back into his WTF-ery, Lil C says that Ade has a “dirty groove…earthy.” It’s hard for me to grab everything that Lil C says, but it says something to do with the fact that Ade doesn’t always “utilize” his groove, but “his time he sat in it [and] pulled Jeanine down into the depths of the dirt… it was buck.”

“The short answer was… it was buck,” Cat says. Love you, Cat.

Mary apologizes first because she forgot to say that Jeanine was terrific in the samba. Nigel quips that he “thought [Mary] had been taking lessons from [his] wife’s divorce attorney.” Burn! Maybe not a good idea to say stuff like that on TV? Mary seems shocked by it.

Mary picks up her corndog and says that she has a feeling Jeanine and Ade wont be “evicted” after that performance. She’s glad Ade found a way to get his bum down—it was up too high. Obviously the dance is much better than it was in rehearsals, because Nigel seems pleased and surprised by the very recent improvements.

Brandon dances his “O Fortuna” solo. You may remember it as the show-stopping piece he tried out with. Cat jokingly calls it “Just average.” (Is that a burn on Lil C?) The judges give Brandon a standing ovation, and Nigel calls it “one of the best solos we’ve ever seen on this show.”

Now Evan and Melissa talk about what it would mean for them, to get into the Top 4.

Coming in, Melissa knew she was oldest person ever on this show, and the first classical ballerina. She feels like an underdog, and she wants to win. Evan interviews that it’s in everyone’s grasp… they’ve got to bring it and take the “final leap” to Top 4. I like the “leap” metaphor, because they are all very capable of amazing leaps.

Evan and Melissa draw the “dreaded quickstep” with Louis van Amstel. Melissa says that people don’t appreciate how hard it is. At one brief point during the rehearsal tape, it sounds like the theme to “The Muppet Show” is playing in the background. Louis tells Evan he needs a six pack, and needs to get stronger (poor Evan!).

Louis tries to create the illusion that Evan is taller, and Evan calls him a “dance magician.” I bet he can’t wait to go back to his real life, where he isn’t known as “the short guy.” (I can see via my blog that people are constantly googling “How tall is Evan?” America wants to know!)

Evan looks dashing in his suit, but it’s really shiny. What is it made out of? Crushed velvet? Garbage can liners? Evan does a long death spiral with Melissa. He does a commendable job, but it’s an obvious strain. Roomie is gushing over Melissa’s dress. The costumes are hearkening back to the 1920s flashbacks on “True Blood” this week (scarring memories).

At the end of the dance, Cat and Melissa bend down so Evan can look tall. Lil C says that Evan danced bigger than ever on the show (for him). I don’t think he’s being completely fair, and I wouldn’t call this Evan’s absolute best dance. (I think Lil C just wants the audience to be on board with him, for once. The booing starts to hurt!)

Mary says that they all know this is one of the toughest dances, and that everything began to crumble as it went. She’s a little disappointed because this did not live up to her expectations.

Nigel ribs Melissa for acting like she’s an old woman because she’s twenty-nine. He jokes (although at first it’s not clear that he’s joking) that Melissa is to this show what Cloris Leachman was to “Dancing with the Stars.” “You’re young and talented,” Nigel reminds her, even though thirty is fairly old in the dancing world. Although this was “not one of the best routines tonight,” Nigel calls them two of the favorites.

Nigel’s statement is a little WTF for me, because I definitely feel like Evan and Melissa are the underdogs, and have been all along. Also… Broadway and Quickstep? It feels a little bit like sabotage to me, since those are traditionally not vote-pulling routines.  Maybe I’m a paranoid crazy-person, but I refuse to believe in the luck-of-the-draw on shows like this. I mean, come on, as if Melissa randomly drew that Romeo and Juliet pointe ballet routine.

Jeanine dances her solo to “Feedback” by Janet Jackson. Topical! It’s a sexier solo than usual. I love her purple top. It’s all about the purple tonight! Jeanine’s competition experience serves her well because she knows all of the impressive elements to put in a solo—the spins and leaps that really give it a wow-factor.

Evan pulls out all the stops in his final solo, starting it off with a series of flips. Nice! And then he does fouettes—someone’s been studying Jeanine’s solo playbook. He ends it with a great big leap. A leap into the Top 4? We’ll see…

What would being in final 4 mean to Kayla and Brandon? It would prove to Brandon that he’s a good dancer. (Um, excuse me? Shouldn’t getting into the Top 20 have proved that? He’s a good dancer, even if he does get out tomorrow.) This experience has helped build Brandon’s self esteem. (Wow. He must have really low self-esteem. Sad.)

Kayla interviews that being in the final 4 would mean everything to her, because she worked so hard every step of the way. True story.

Brandon and Kayla get Disco with Doriana Sanchez. As soon as they walk in, Doriana has Brandon on the floor, doing push-ups. Kayla interviews that this is not a regular disco, but more like a circus dance. It’s “so hard” (heh).

They dance to “Disco Heat” by Sylvester. Kayla dressed like a disco ball. Actually, they both are. They do a “double death drop,” where they take turns dropping each other into a spiral. It’s a solid dance, but it isn’t my favorite disco of the season. I miss Janette!

Lil C weighs in that “being out of your comfort zone represents unfamiliarity and also darkness. You have to befriend the characteristics of your challenge. If you see the music with your ears, there is no darkness. I saw no darkness in this routine.” (Or something like that.) And also, “You have to get in between those instruments, into the pocket.” Since Brandon has done disco once before, Lil C thanks him for “coming for Kayla” (heh).

Mary says, “Holy smokies!” She thinks they hit a home run tonight. Also, FYI, she says that if Brandon messed up the lift, Kayla would have had “head trauma.” Reality check! Mary stands and yells at Brandon for having self esteem problems. (Because yelling at people always cures their insecurities.) She tells him he’s a Hot Tamale, and that he has to believe in himself. (If he gets off tomorrow, we can ship him off to the “More to Love” Manse of Self-Esteem.) Kayla is still on the Train (of course).

Nigel says, “To be frank, it’s easy to hype an audience.” He proceeds to runs around the judges tables, screaming like a “lunatic.” I guess that’s a seal of approval.

“Nigel, for goodness sake! Take the tablets!” Cat jokes. “What have I told you? Take the tablets!”

Dear Everybody, I still don’t understand the fox.com/pause commercials. Please help.

Last dance: the girls dance with Sonya Tayeh. The theme of the song is “superheroes.” Sonya wants to show off their strengths.

Jeanine likes idea—“you can jump into a phone booth and fly out in a colorful unitard.” (Too bad Randi is gone. She would have been all about a colorful unitard.)

According to Sonya, Kayla is Storm, Jeanine is Wonder-Woman, and Melissa is… Buttercup? Is Buttercup a real superhero? Doesn’t sound very tough. Melissa should probably be Mystique, or Cat Lady. (Oh wait, she’s married.) (Sorry, terrible joke.)

During rehearsals, Jeanine smashes Kayla in the face. It’s an accident, right? Yes it is, but wouldn’t it be easy for one dancer to sabotage another? Whoops, I dropped you. Sorry about the head trauma!

Just before the dance starts, Jeanine interviews that “strong, powerful women” are superheroes. Girl power! I like it.

Of course, the costumes and makeup are fierce. What are superheroes made of? Long, strong legs, for starters. The camera seems to find Kayla and Jeanine much more than Melissa. I have to say, though—I think I preferred the all-boys routine.

Lil C makes a joke about Sonya running superhero high school for girls. In a weird way, it’s true. He says that “cohesively” is one of his favorite words, and adds that it means “together.” “People know what it means, Lil C,” my roommate says, annoyed.

Lil C was more enigmatic than usual tonight, and kind of a party pooper. He says that he needs “more than amazing right now.” Also: “You gotta eat, the stage is your bowl.” I think he implies that some girls are dancing down to accommodate others, but I’m too busy deciphering his initial statements to fully comprehend everything that gets dished out.

Once again, Cat handles the clean-up. “I’m not quite sure what you said, but I know I’m starting to get hungry,” Cat chirps. Does she mean that the bowl reference made her hungry, or that the show is almost over and she’s ready for a snack? Probably both.

Mary calls Lil C on his bull. “What’s after amazing?” She thinks that the girls are the epitome of strong, versatile, flexible, sexy, talented dancers. Kayla stood out for getting slightly tougher moves. Mary laments that they didn’t have this dance under their belts last week. They could have taken it to Comic Con.

“Saving the world one convention at a time,” Cat says. If someone isn’t piping this into her ear, she’s a genius.

Nigel: “Is it a bird? Is it a plane? No, it’s an arabesque!” He loves the girls’ chemistry. In his mind, no one person stood out. They were all fantastic. Nigel points out that each costume has personal touches. Melissa’s has a little ballet skirt. Kayla looks slim (that’s not exactly news to us). To Jeanine, he says, “Wow. You can’t tie down talent.” Turns out he’s complimenting her chest, because the bodice of her top is all laced up. Oh, Nigel. You’re lucky you’re aged and British, or you’d get a lot more flack for saying things like that to an 18-year-old girl.

Roomie has a feeling that Melissa and Evan are going home, and I can’t argue with her. At this point it’s anyone’s game. I would like to see Kayla and Jeanine in the Top 4, but I’m more on the fence about the boys.

All will be revealed tomorrow night…

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