Slow Down and Fast

September 19, 2010

Queen's Court, USC.

I got out of services around 12:30pm yesterday. I keep intending to go to the USC area to eat all the food that wasn’t here when I was a student (21 Choices, Chick-fil-A, Lemonade…), but obviously on Yom Kippur that was out of the question.

Even though I don’t fast hardcore, I wouldn’t eat in public on Yom Kippur. Gotta keep up appearances.

But I didn’t want to leave right away, so I decided to take a reflective little stroll down memory lane before heading back to my “real life.”

On Rosh Hashanah I walked around and looked at all of the new buildings– the new film school, the new student center. So on Yom Kippur, I decided to visit my favorite familiar haunts.

The first stop was the inverted fountain next to the Norris Theater (above). It’s located next to a grassy area known as Queen’s Court, because all of the surrounding buildings are named after women. It’s a really serene area. Female energy? I don’t know.

It was also nice to just chill at the fountain between Doheny and Bovard (the center of campus, I guess), because I think last time I stood there was during graduation, in a clusterfuck of a million people.

Ah, water.

Go Trojans.

I encountered a random new behemoth fountain next to Leavey Library. Which is weird, because there’s already a really awesome, well-integrated wading-pool style fountain in front of the library. I don’t know how I feel about this newbie.

How do we fell about this?

So that’s where your tuition goes, kids.

By then I was fantasizing about what I would eat to break my fast. Out of everything I could possibly choose in all of LA/the World, this is what I wanted: Chicken soup with circle cut carrots, and King’s Hawaiian bread. (Because my beloved honey/spice bread/cake is apparently off the table… sigh.)

I’m so easy.

So I drove to the Von’s in my neighborhood, because it’s totally normal for Jews to hang out in grocery stores on Yom Kippur, wearing drab gray “Mad Men” dresses that are probably 1 or 2 sizes too big on them.

On the way I happened to flip my radio to NPR and heard most of a “This American Life” segment in which Darin Strauss told the story of how he accidentally killed his high school classmate (her bike swerved in front of his car) and the fallout of that incident. It’s the subject of his new book, Half a Life.

When I got to Von’s I sat in my car for a while just listening, because the story was so compelling.  He talked about how much he thinks about the girl (Celine), and how if the tables were reversed and she had killed him, he would have wanted Celine to forget about him. He also tried to imagine scenes from her childhood, just clunking around on roller skates or whatever. I was trying not to cry, because a CRYING Jew in a grocery store on Yom Kippur is double weird.

(Ugh, and now I’m crying and I have to get get my laundry out of the dryer. That seems super pathetic, crying and doing laundry. I’m like the beginning of a rom com.)

But it felt like appropriate radio-listening on Yom Kippur. (More appropriate than the Rihanna that I was car-freak-dancing to before I flipped channels.)

The funny thing is, I left before the Yizkor service because I read ahead and it’s all sad and death-y and I didn’t want to sit around crying about death in public. (Also, superstition– from what I’ve heard, you’re not supposed to go to Yizkor if both of your parents are alive.) (I don’t want to jinx them!)

But some things are meant to happen. (I mean– hearing about death. Not jinxing my parents.)

Oh, but back to circle carrots. Maybe that phrase baffled you, because it’s an Elysse thing. For some reason I am obsessed with the circle carrots in certain Progresso soups.

EXACTLY.

Because a Jew in a drab gray dress with teary red eyes in a grocery store on Yom Kippur TAKING PICTURES OF FOOD is not weird at all.

I also bought the Hearty Chicken & Rotini (also with circle carrots), because everybody’s getting sick lately. And when I get sick, my insane need for circle carrots becomes even more profound. (This did not become a thing until a few years ago. Let me repeat: This is not a vestigial childhood weirdness. This is a full-grown adult oddity.)

I wanted to get a 4-pack of King’s Hawaiian Sweet Bread, but in the bread aisle they only had TWELVE packs. I was like, no way Jose, that is TOO MUCH BREAD. I almost went to a SECOND grocery store. But luckily I wandered around and fround the GIANT DISPLAY of 4-PACKS. In the front of the store.

The Hawaiian bread shrine.

YES. (It was also my breakfast today… and I still have 2 rolls left!)

Here’s my loot!

Simple tastes!

Yes, I forgot to use a canvas shopping bag on YOM KIPPUR, but when I went home I cleaned my room and this made a perfect new trash bag for my tiny bathroom trash. So I don’t feel guilty. I will not be atoning for this plastic bag next year.

I took a picture of the circle carrots because they were so amazing, but when I tried to de-blur the photo in Piknik, somehow the carrots ended up looking radioactive… and nipply?

Why do the carrots have areolas?!

Anyway, yeah. That was Yom Kippur.

And now, back to my regularly scheduling EATING.

xoxo…

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A Very MAD MEN Kol Nidre

September 17, 2010

Can you hear me now?

‘Tis the night before Yom Kippur, and my stomach is already feeling a bit grumbly. I said I wasn’t going to fast hardcore, but it’s downright wimpy to eat or drink between sundown and sunrise. C’mon!

So I’m writing a little blog for you instead. (Crystal urged me to blog Kol Nidre, but I don’t know if she realized that it’s a food-free affair.) And trying to make this have to do with “Mad Men,” because this is not The Daily Prayer.

I always like to go to Kol Nidre (aka Yom Kippur Eve), because there is sad/pretty music. So I wore a Target dress that looks kinda soccer-mom-at-a-school-recital-in-the-’burbs to work today (a few co-workers said, “Nice dress!” and I replied, “NO.”), and went directly from there to services at USC’s Hillel. The current Rabbi is named Lori, and I like her insights and sermons.

According to Lori, Kol Nidre (it’s also the name of a once-a-year song) was the first thing ever heard in a talkie. (JEWS FTW!) As you may recall, THE JAZZ SINGER is about a Jewish guy (a cantor’s son) who goes undercover in blackface because he wants to be… a jazz singer.

I didn’t really make the “Mad Men” connection until I googled “The Jazz Singer,” and most of the pictures of Al Jolson looked a little bit like this…

CRINGE.

That’s Roger Sterling, for you “Mad Men” dopes. Season 3.

The second “Mad Men” reference was more overt. Lori told a story about working in a senior facility in Manhattan. A 90-year-old woman who “dressed like Joan from ‘Mad Men’” walked into Lori’s office one day and said, “I went to the doctor, and it’s official: I’m pregnant.”

Old people can be hilarious!

BUT that night, the Joan lady died of a stroke. WAH WAHHHH. Sad. Double sad. She was so vivacious!

Overall, the sort of theme of tonight’s sermon was that we have to stop sleepwalking through life so that when we die (AT ANY MOMENT), we won’t have any regrets about everything we didn’t do. We’ll just be like, time to die. “High five!” (That’s a direct quote from Rabbi Lori.)

That makes me think of Don’s snap-out-of-it episode this past week. He assessed his life and was not happy with what he saw. So he’s trying to change.

What am I doing?

It’s interesting to resolve NOT to sleep-walk through life on Yom Kippur, because one of those most intriguing aspects of this day is that we’re living like the dead (and/or vampires). Not eating. Not drinking. Not bathing. Not sexing each other up (okay, maybe not so much like vampires). Just kinda walking around in a cloud. (And generally trying to sleep as much as possible, to get through the 25 hours of no food or drink.)

I like the idea of being a ghost for a day, because I’m all about quiet observation. (A paradox for those of you who know me, because I’m maybe more known for being at the center of loud conversations.) But I also very much like the idea of coming through that cloud, finding some sort of clarity, and living a more lifey life for the other 364-ish days of the year.

Ironically, my major resolution is to write more, which is kind of a ghosty/sleepwalky pursuit.

Rabbi Lori ended her sermon with, “Let the games begin.” Very Hunger Games. Yom Kippur is totally a hunger game.

Whether or not I break the fast (and I may be masochistic tomorrow and post some of my backlogged food pics), the official snack of Yom Kippur, according to Rabbi Lori, is air.

I’m going to go to sleep now, but I’ll leave you with a midnight snack… I took this in Long Beach two weeks ago, but I’m feeling too lazy to tag it.

Are you full yet?

Looks like the walls of my bedroom at my house house. Very relaxing.

An easy fast to those of you who are going to do it up. I’m always tempted to GO THERE, but I think I’m going to try to stick to my non-fasting guns this year. With all the sickness going around, I’m not keen on weakening my immune system. (And in fact, my resting/eating habits on Yom Kippur are sorta like a preemptive sick day… mostly water and broths.)

Good night, and good luck.

Oh, and I’m totally wearing my “Mad Men”-style dress to services tomorrow.

xoxo…


Happy Jew Year!

September 8, 2010

That's pepper on the matzo ball. My doing.

Sorry I didn’t write yesterday. Actually… I’m not sorry. NOT sorry I didn’t write yesterday. I didn’t eat anything worth writing about, and I was reading the second Hunger Games book (Catching Fire). Among other things.

OH HEY, did you know that today (er, beginning at sundown today) is ROSH HASHANAH? Also known as the Jewish new year? Apparently it’s 5771 now. I have some mental block against knowing what Jewish year it is. Usually I just default to 5756, because it has a nice ring to it. (Apparently 5756 was in 1995. That was probably the one year I had to learn the Jewish year, in Hebrew school or something.)

The traditional Snack of Rosh Hashanah is apples and honey, for a sweet new year. We have both of those things in the office so I just might chow down… later. For now, I happen to have a Jewishy post on deck, so I figured I’d slap it up this morning, so I can go back to Catching Fire… and work. (I DO work, you know.) (GLARE.)

Over the weekend my parents and I took an unexpected jaunt to LA to rescue a beloved family couch from being kicked to the curb. On the way home we stopped in Long Beach and lunched at Katella Deli, one of our family’s chosen Jewish delis. (Get it?)

What I actually ate is pictured above. I think I literally ate that whole basket of bread. But if I’m going to binge on a basket of bread, that is the best basket possible. Pumpernickel, rye, challah, and what I THINK were mini kaiser rolls, with poppy or sesame seeds on top (the first basket had poppy seed).

And matzo ball soup is a Passover food, but whatever.

My favorite part of Katella deli is the order-out counter in the back, where you can admire all sorts of amazing desserts, most of which are somewhat nostalgic for all the Jews out there who grew up eating.

As far as the eye can see...

I have a soft spot for the sprinkle cookies… you know how I love my rainbow sprinkles.

Cookies a la sprinkle.

Whenever I post something colorful, I always have to stop myself from just writing, “The colors! The colors!” I think that was a line in an old Skittles commercial.

Also, can you spot my finger in the shot? I keep doing that, lately. Amateur hour.

Oh, here’s another holiday food that’s not at all associated with Rosh Hashanah. Hamentaschen. For Purim!

I'm skeptical about the prune flavor.

I gotta wonder if prune’s a big seller. I mean, I guess they cater to an older clientele. But my faves are apricot, poppy seed, and chocolate (duh). (Duh to all of those, knowing me.)

The hamentaschen are supposed to look like a three-cornered hat, because the bad guy (Hamen) always wore one. But that’s a story for PURIM, not Rosh Hashanah.

And here are a few desserts that have nothing to do with any personal nostalgia/Jewish holidays, but I just had to document them.

Can you spot everything adorable in this picture?

Those sea creatures slay me! I love starfishes! And those ladybugs are TOO HAPPY. I don’t know if I could eat these. Too cute.

And here’s a dessert where the animal is not a plastic thingy…

Not sure how I feel about this...

Kinda creeps me out, but I bet it’s delicious.

Lest you think that Rosh Hashanah is way healthier than all the other holidays, it also involves round loaves of challah and HONEY CAKE. Oh man, the thing I miss most about college is the amazing honey cake (spice bread?) they had at Hillel this time of year. If I can make it there this year and they still have it, I’m going to steal like 100 pieces. (Or… 4.)

In college I’d always break my Yom Kippur fast with the Hillel honey/spice bread/cake, but my body hates fasting (surprise surprise?), so food/drink would BURN my dehydrated mouth. (I’ve also ended fasts with intense vomiting… I generally don’t fast anymore.)

I wish I had the recipe for that cake, so I wouldn’t have to infiltrate/eat it when my mouth isn’t functioning.

But the potential for pain and torture comes next week. For now… HAPPY NEW YEAR! (Cue mouth-buzzer kazoos and confetti.)

L’shanah tovah!

xoxo…


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